I need....

1. To get more sleep
2. To get settled into my new place
3. More hugs and Kisses from QT
4. Learn patience
5. Lose weight
6. Longer weekends
7. Pancakes
8. A full body massage
9. A facial
10. More Money
11. To be more positive
12. A HOLIDAY!!!

Count to 10...

9...8...7...

Nope still not working.

Had a run in with the new landlords last night and I am still seething.

They promised me the place would be complete when I moved in 1 March.

It is almost end of March and I have only just received cupboards, a basin in the bathroom and a kitchen.

I am still waiting for a cupboard door in the bathroom and the sealing on my bath to be completed.

I wish the dust would settle now - my place is always dirty and it frustrates me.

Then they have the cheek to tell me they told me from the beginning my place wouldnt be ready - when I have smses proving otherwise.

This is the exact reason I didnt want to move in to begin with.

Then they give me a lease to sign and put me as the Lessor and them as the Lessee - have you ever?

I have until end of August to look for something else - wish me luck.

Kelly Clarkson ROCKS!!

Friday I was lucky enough to be given a spare ticket to Kelly Clarkson!

I am  HUGE fan of hers and I love her songs because she always manages a way to voice the thoughts I have in my head about love and heartache.

Behind these Hazel Eyes is 1 of my favourites and now Long Shot is another - I simply cannot get sick of her music.

Let me say when she walked onto stage - I was blown away - she is so... NORMAL.

Jeans and T shirt, shirt nails and some nice eye make up. I guess when you have a voice like that - why do you need all the other bits of decoration.

Since you've been gone was a huge crowd pelaser and had me singing so loudly I almost lost my voice (trust me this is as possible as my friend Tee saying no to a Chocolate Martini!)

Capetonians - take along comfy shoes because you are going to want to jump up and down with all the 15 year old groupies at the show!

ENJOY!

It's complicated!

I have nearly lost my mind a few times these past few weeks.

How I am holding onto my sanity - is beyond me.

Between finding a place to stay and then moving in at the very last minute to an uninhabitable place, to my (ex) house mate being downright rude to me on move out day, to work being an absolute nightmare.

The situation between MC & QT has been playing on my mind alot and all came to a head the other night.

Let me just state for the record that QT is unbelievable.

This man is awesome and I cant say enough how I wish he was older.

I had a bad week last week and the only thing that got me through it was QT. He is quitely supportive and oh so sweet.

I have been considering putting a holt on my relationship whatever you want to call it with MC. There is not much going on besides our conversations.

Yet I cant break the hold he seems to have on me. I cant imagine my life without MC.

QT was never supposed to be any more than wishful thinking on my side, then when we hooked up, I thought it was a flash in the pan.

Now I know it isn't.

I want QT in my life always - I guess deep down I know nothing will ever come of it because of he age gap - yet I hope to be there to watch him grow into the amazing man I know he is destined to become.

I am jealous of the girl who will get him 1 day.

I have been so worried about QT getting hurt - so when he told me he knew - I was devastated that he might be hurt and then so relieved when he seemed ok with it.

He then asked me to be his girlfriend - oh man how I wish I could say yes!

But that just gives me more of a chance to hurt him - and I am avoiding that all costs!

So instead I have now changed my status on Facebook - "its complicated"

That sums it up!