I'm in trouble

I have fallen for MC. In a BIG way. Yes yes I can hear you all telling me that it is too soon, blah blah blah.

Unfortunately I have never been able to choose the when or why it happens, my heart decides for me and if you thought I had a mind of my own, my heart outdoes me!

Crushes – yes I have them all the time.


Lust – yes had those too.


Love – Not often.

Love # 1:


Name: The Greek


Long term prospects: Zero


Reason: Lives in Greece & different culture


1st day of highschool (1992) – Fell in love with his turquoise eyes and light brown hair and cute laugh. I go home that day and write in my diary that I have met the man I will lose my virginity to. (At this stage I had not even kissed a guy yet!)


1993 – He moves to Greece and I get to see him once a year when he comes back to SA. Not condusive to a close relationship.


1996 – I lost my virginity to him on 1 of his visits to SA.




Lesson learnt: When a man loves you he will do anything to see you and treats you with respect.


What would I change: Have him live in SA.


Love # 2:


Name: BD


Long term prospects: Zero


Reason: Emotionally unavailable & not trustworthy.




2002 – Was set up with GC and fell in love with BD instead.


I couldn’t stop staring at him even though he didn’t say a word to me.


After a few months of dating GC I ended it and eventually in the New year I was very brave and made the first move, I was not letting him go!


After cheating on me twice we eventually ended it.


Lesson learnt: BD taught me more about myself and relationships than anyone else. He taught me that I deserve to be treated with respect (because he didn’t always respect me) at all times and never settle for anything less.


He also helped me to tame my temper a bit.


When trust is broken, you never get it back.

What would I change: More openness and honesty


More communication


Wish he wasn’t so selfish




Love # 3:


Name: Alex


Long term prospects: Excellent




I 1st met Alex in 2004 and when he walked out the door I told my colleague I was going to marry him 1 day.


He was totally unlike the guys I usually found attractive – blonde with blue eyes and a very sexy british accent to boot.


I was too afraid to ever make a move so we remained friends and met for coffee once a month until 4 years later in 2008 when he made the move over dinner 1 night.


I was madly in love with him and he seemed perfect.


He was a true gentleman, listened to my stories and even offered great advice.


Was totally understanding and supportive and I was convinced we were going to get married.


January 2009 he pulled the carpet from under my feet and told me he could not marry me even though he loved me more than anyone he had ever dated and he would have been very happy with me forever, just didn’t want to marry me.


Took me 10 months to get over the heartbreak, it almost destroyed me.




Lesson learnt: Everything I thought I wanted in another person exists – I just have to be patient until I find it


A boyfriend can be your best friend too



What would I change: His friends – I really didn’t like them!


Potential Love # 4:


Name: MC


Long term prospects: Remains to be seen – but I think there is HUGE potential


Reason: Once he is over his breakup issues…. He seems to be everything that I want in a man.


I cannot stop thinking about him. We had a rocky few days because he has just recently broken up with his girlfriend and has lost a lot of confidence.


I have a good feeling about him, the same way I had felt about Alex. By now I know exactly what I want and what traits I want in another person.


MC has all these traits.


He was extremely quiet at stages – and I didn’t know how to handle that.


Once he explained the reason behind it, I can fully understand the turmoil he is experiencing – the end of a 2 year relationship is so difficult.

For now I will try help him as much as I can from Jhb – I would like to get to know him better and it is almost a good thing to meet him like this while he is having a hard time, because I get a good indication how he handles bad experiences as well as the good.




I have the utmost respect for MC. He really is one of the few decent men out there and I love his intelligence and sense of humour.


He is kind and considerate and I love that as successful and good looking as he is, he is not arrogant.


I have always wanted a daughter with green eyes and with MC also having green eyes it is almost guaranteed!


And he likes the name Layla (which is going to be my daughters name!)




He is a fellow Gemini, so we already understand each other really well.


He also gives the best hugs and he thinks I have a sexy bum (bonus points considering I am the fattest I have ever been) and he loves giving me foot rubs.


I love that he strokes my leg while we are sitting down and the gentle kisses he gives me on my temple and in my neck. (I do wish I got more of those but I look forward to and hope that I get a chance to get more of those)


I love the fact that he came back to Jhb 2 weeks later to visit me because 1 month was just too long to wait.




He is genuinely nice to people – no just his friends – but waitresses as well (for me this is always a good indication of a persons character)


He is an animal lover and feels as strongly about them as I do.




And he loves cats, has 2 of his own and he enjoys Girly movies – could he be any more perfect??


Oh and how about the fact that I absolutely love his friends? I think they are the most awesome people!


Now tell me this: Why wouldn’t I want to marry him?