I have too much drama at work, and I really don't have the time or the energy to deal with drama in my real life too. (I like to think of work as a bad dream, something I might 1 day wake up from)
You might remember me speaking about my Housemate / ex boyfriend's girlfriend.
The day her and I moved out of the place we shared, we literally walked past each other without saying a word.
She had left me in the lurch and at the last minute told me she was moving out, forcing me to find another place to stay in a hurry.
I don't think people ever understood why/how her & I ever decided to move in together, but what they never realised is that only she understood how I felt about BD and how he was. He was a very complicated man.
Anyway, it has been 2 years and I saw her in a shopping mall. I was devastated that she had seen me, because I really feel like a gross lump of... Fat.
She stopped to talk to me and caught me up on some gossip. I really wish I had looked better, because she still looked exactly the same and I can imagine her going back to her friends and telling them how terrible I am looking.
A few hours later I saw my ex Alex in the shopping centre and again my 1st thought was: "Run, maybe he won't recognise you! Actually, he probably wouldn't have anyway
Then today my ex Cutie writes to me and I find myself wondering
Why is this all happening?
Is the universe trying to tell me something?
I made myself a promise this weekend to tie up all loose ends and get rid of all this drama currently in my life. Not as easy as I had first thought.
I am still trying to process the whole Iron Man thing.
AK, he is an amazing man. You can't blame me for developing feelings for him.
What did he feel for me?If anything? I can't say - because I don't know.
I will never know what went on in his head.
He and I never had the "Let's talk" conversation. I hate loose ends. But sometimes you just need to let it go & move on.
I learn long ago that I will never know why men do what they do.
It is what it isAccept it
Move on
I'm going all cross-eyed reading this. Isn't that always the way when you bump into your ex's as well? You always wish you looked like a supermodel, lol!
ReplyDeleteI also know what you mean regarding not knowing why things end - it really preys on my mind, but what can you do at the end of the day? You're doing the right thing, definitely.
Thank you Kate - means alot! xx
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