Dear....

These emails have done the rounds - but I had to share them with you - they make me laugh:

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns

Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection.
Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely, Logic

Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a bitch.
Sincerely, The Titanic

Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely, Anonymous

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely, Canada

Dear Boyfriend,
I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can.
Sincerely, Spiders

Dear Voldemort,
So they screwed up your nose too?
Sincerely, Michael Jackson

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely, Google

Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding! They're all dead.
Sincerely, BP

Dear Mary,
Just admit that you slept with someone else. This is getting out of hand.
Sincerely, Joseph

Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely, 1985

Dear Justin Bieber,
Ariel would really love her voice back.
Sincerely, King Triton

Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that raft for the both of us.
Sincerely, Jack

Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can't touch this.
Sincerely, That Little Triangle

Dear Taylor Swift,
If it is of any interest to you, Romeo and Juliet both kill themselves in the end.
Sincerely, Shakespeare
Dear Soccer Fans,
B B B B B B Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z
Z Z
Z
Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z!
Sincerely, Vuvuzelas

Dear Rubik's Cube,
Done!
Sincerely, Colorblind

Dear Santa,
Please tell me how you managed to stop at three Ho's.
Sincerely, Tiger Woods

Dear Boys Wearing Skinny Jeans,
I. Can't. Breathe.
Sincerely, Your Balls

Dear Martin Luther King Jr.,
I have a dream within a dream within a dream within another dream...
What now?
Sincerely, Leonardo DiCaprio

Dear Sleeping Beauty,
I had to join the army, dress up like a man, defeat the hun army and totally save China for my man.
All you had to do was wake up.
Sincerely, Mulan

Dear Romeo,
My death isn't the only thing I've been faking...
Sincerely, Juliet

Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely, Unimpressed

Dear Sex Educators,
Abstinence is only 99.99% effective.
Sincerely, The Virgin Mary

Dear Toaster,
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn?
Sincerely, Toast


Dear Edward,
I really hope that one day, I can find my way into your heart.
Sincerely, a stake


Dear Prince Charming,
You've got some explaining to do!
Sincerely, Cinderella, Snow White, Rapunzel, and Sleeping Beauty

iRandom

Some more random things about me:

1. I cannot cut straight - tried it again today - even with lines, I manage to mess it up
2. I am not a huge ice cream fan - unless it is Cornetto with strawberries
3. I love a good piece of chocolate cake, but my favourite is vanilla with butter icing
4. I am obsessed with hot gorgeous men - yes I am a pervert. Ian Somerhalder - please marry me?? I am willing to have babies if they look like you!!
5. Speaking of babies - my nephew has to come early due to his heart rate being too high - I will be an Aunty on Tuesday.... perhaps some baby instinct buried deep inside me will come out.
6. I am still not sure if I really like Twitter - the only reason I am on it is to stalk follow my future husband Ian Somerhalder                                            
7. I  like walking around in various states of undress - something I can look forward to continue doing now that I am going to be living on my own again
8. I love my Blackberry

Oh whatever shall I buy?

Kirsty

Tess

Pony Bisque

I have to make a tough decision this weekend.

Either I buy myself new "Fat Jeans" (I tore mine) or I buy a couch - something I have wanted for over a year.

My rationale is as follows:

• It is depressing to buy fat jeans.
• It is fun to buy a pretty couch. And more useful! (ok more costly, but I will pointedly ignore your remarks)

So now the choice....

Which couch do I buy?

Change in living plans

After paying a deposit and having all our arrangements made - we were told the day before we were due to move that the owner had changed her mind - sorry!

Left without a place to stay and at one of my busiest times (trying to get our quarterly catalogues designed) we now had to find another place.

I called Tee to say we needed to get on it immediately and she started oohing and aahing about where to look. So I told her I am going on my own.

After calling 8 places and having them all be taken, I was making 1 more call and then I was going to curl up into a ball and cry.
Luckily they arranged a viewing for me that same afternoon.

The rental is a bit high, but it is a cute place and I do not have time to look at more places and risk losing this place - so I took it.

It is a 1 bedroom with a huge garden. I am excited that I get 2 whole parking spaces to myself as well as a big garden.
Right now I come home to find someone in my parking and it is really getting annoying.

So to all those who left me messages to celebrate with a glass of champagne - I reckon this deserves a whole bottle...

Cheers!

I love my friend for sending me these: